time came a-knockin'
she tore down the door to my bedroom and she pulled me out of bed
she pushed me in the shower and made me wash my head
she drove me to the airport and started up a cessna
took me to the sky and told me keep my head up
“stop looking back, that’s nowhere to be” she’d say to me
plan out your days and watch
as this haze
falls
away.
time came a-knockin'
she said pack your bags
take out the fuckin’ trash
i’ve gotta show you what it means to love yo’ ass
so she took me to a river
she said yell at it without holdin’ back
now
looked at her like she was full of craze
but did it anyhow
i yelled at the water and it yelled back
a screamin’ match over ex-lovers and stupid straw hats
time came back
she said light your own match
let me teach you to make a fire
one that will keep you warm next winter
so you don’t go crawlin' back to a love of your past
she told me a story
of a little girl sleepin’ under the moon
“you see how much she loves you?”
and for the first time in a millennium,
i listened
my hard head said not today ms. hurricane,
listen to what she’s got to say
i learned how to love her back
and i always end up on a runway
chasing till i get the airspeed in green
laughing at all i do at eighteen
lettin’ the scuffed shoes out
i take ‘em for walks and we sit by the river
screamin' like time told me to do
and as the months have passed
she doesn’t need to come knockin’ no mo'
she packed me up a box of tools and said
here
take these
fix up your heart on your sleeve
and show me how badly you want it
that life you think about when you close your eyes
that feeling you chase when you’re high up in the sky
the woman you so wish to be
she comes to visit me every now and then
not bangin’ down the door
just a passin’ glance
and i reassure her
i’m not dancin’ with no devil
and that life i dreamed about
i’m makin’
that feelin' i’ve been chasin’
i’m makin’
that woman i wished to be
i’m makin’.
so to airports and runways i go
rivers and streams and lovin’ no mo’
fires and sparks and hurricanes
i am.
i won’t let her find me that way again
not because i’m ashamed
but because i know
my
own
damn
name.
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